The Ba Gua Etuis Box – Episode 1

The Ba Gua Etuis Box
Episode 1

Written, Directed and Produced By Charles Davis
Charles Davis as Otto Vainikainen
Noelle Micarelli as Patricia Lacroix and Barbara Diya
Jonathan Schoeck as Vicki Jones
Josie Corichi as the Brothel Nodes
Daniel Rider as M.A.R.T.I.N.

Setting: Futuristic Boston. Robots are a part of everyday life.


Olavi “Otto” Vainikainen – Private investigator. Is generally an upbeat happy person, but is starting to get upset with the amount of disturbing cases he’s been seeing lately.

Patricia Lacroix – Otto’s secretary/assistant. She is French. Helps him investigate things (as long as it’s not too dangerous). She is a sarcastic metal-head and dresses like it.

Barbara Diya – Mysterious woman. She is hiring Otto to investigate her Brother, Homer’s, death. She generally keeps to her self and is vague. Seems oddly disinterested and emotionless in her brother’s death. Has some kind of strange connection to MARTIN.

M.A.R.T.I.N. (Multi-Aviation-Reconnaissance- and-Tactical-Information-Node) – A mysterious robot who is somehow influencing Barbara Diya.

Victor “Vicki” Jones- Police officer. Is having a somewhat secret affair with Patricia. Is generally a nice guy. Somewhat deep too.


Scene: Some cold dang concrete room where someone is being threatened to do something

Barbara: (moment of silence). No… I won’t. (a very faint noise of circuits buzzing and buttons beeping can be heard)… (bitter) you don’t scare me. Just lock me up. Throw away the button. Cut me to pieces and leave it for the rats. (a noise of metal scrapping against metal can be heard. Like something dragging across the floor and coming closer to you). (Faintly whimpers for a very brief second). I don’t care. I won’t.

(A very loud noise of metal scrapping against metal is heard again, this time it is very close. A noise that sounds like something coming unlatched is heard too and then buzzing. Barbara starts breathing very heavily and whimpering)

MARTIN: (speaks with a very electronic computer voice. Booming and intimidating). YOU WILL AQUIRE THE KAN YU JIA.

Barbara: (Whimpers some more)… Ok… ok.

(The noise of the latch closes and the buzzing stops. You can still hear Barbara breathing heavily. Her breathing fades away.)

(Scene: At Otto’s office in downtown Boston.)

(Noise of sci-fi traffic from the street fades in. This blends and fades into the sound of someone sitting at a desk flipping the pages of a magazine while listening to heavy metal on her headphones. There is a fan blowing in the background.)

(After a moment, the sound of a door opening is heard, footsteps walking into the office, the door closing behind him and hanging his jacket on the coat hanger.)

Otto: (after a moment of looking at Patricia and knowing she can’t hear him). Patricia… Oh Patricia. My sweet ingénue. Can you hear me? (creeping up behind her). My dearest and lovely delicate flower of a lady Patricia. Can you… Hear me!?

(Otto grabs Patricia in order to startle her. She screams and you hear the magazine and the headphones drop and hit the floor.)

Patricia: God damn it Otto! (gasping for breath. Otto laughs). You son of a bitch. (you hear her pick up the magazine and pick up the headphones and turn them off). Va niquer ta mere.

Otto: Hey baby, I don’t pay you to read, I pay you to… uh… I don’t know… Intercede or something like that.

Patricia: You’re such a word slinger.

Otto: Thank you. Any messages?

Patricia: eeeeeeh, let me see. (sound papers shuffling) Tom Erno wants to know if you’ve caught his wife screwing around on him yet

Otto: Yep, done.

Patricia: Mikael Onovitch needs you testify in a deportation hearing

Otto: Again?

Patricia: They found coke.

Otto: (groans) no. He’s on his own.

Patricia: Uhhh, Michele Jonesworth (Otto makes an intrigued grunt) wants you to investigate an important item (Otto makes a confused unhappy grunt)… known as her underpants (Otto lets out an excited “ooooo!”). And finally a man named Arthur Madison called. He is being accused of plagiarizing parts of his book and thinks he is being framed. He wants you to investigate.

Otto: Arthur Madison. Where do I recognize that name from?

Patricia: I guess he’s a semi-famous writer.

Otto: (unsure) Mmmmmm, I’ll think about.

Patricia: …And that’s it.

Otto: Ok

Patricia: How was your day?

Otto: (sighs. Is still up beat but with a very slight amount of sadness). Oh it was fine. The Julianne MarcBerger case is wrapped up now. I found her father dead. He was involved with the JP section of the Hedon Cult and got in over his head. I found him more or less bi-sected in a house by the pond. The cultist had cleared out though.

Patricia: For a group that’s into hedonism they sure do like to maim.

Otto: Yeah, tell me about it. Oh before I forget, I found a random hand bone laying in the house. Here you go.

Patricia: Ah! I actually have a necklace I’m half done with that this would work well in.

Otto: Cool. I’m going to go do some billing, feel free to send people through.

Patricia: K

(the sound of Otto walking to his office, opening and closing the door. Patricia puts her head phones back on and starts playing the music again. You also hear her flip through the magazine again.)

(There is just these noises for a little bit. The sound of a knock on the front door can then be heard. Patricia, with the headphones playing, doesn’t hear anything. The knocking gets louder. Patricia still doesn’t hear. The sound of the door opening.)

Barbara: Hello? (Patricia still not hearing her) HELLO??

Patricia: (Now hearing her and taking off her headphones, putting down the magazine and turning off the music) Oh! Sorry. Hello, can I help you?

Barbara: Yes, I’m looking for Mr. (struggling) Van –y – Kay…

Patricia: (correcting Barbara) Vainikainen. Yes, what’s your name?

Barabara: Barbara Diya

Patricia: One moment please. (sound of Patricia picking up phone) Otto, you have a Barbara Diya to see you.

Otto: (over the phone) send her in.

Patricia: (hangs up phone) Go ahead.

Barbara: Thank you.

(The sound of Barabara walking to Otto’s office. The door opening and closing).

Otto: Hello, Miss, mrs?

Barabara: Miss.

Otto: Hello Ms. Diya, please have a seat.

Barabara: Thanks,

Otto: Now, what did you want to see me about?

Barabara: (fairly monotone) My brother was murdered. The police have been trying to find the killer for 6 months but have come up with nothing and I’m thoroughly convinced they will not be finding anything anytime soon. I want you to find the killer since the police can’t.

Otto: What makes you think that I would do a better job than the police force?

Barabara: Because I’m going to give you information that I can’t give them.

Otto: (after some silence). Ok, so what’s this additional information?

Barbara: I’ll only tell after you accept the case. I guarantee I can pay your expenses.

Otto: Ms. Diya, Just because you can pay the cost of investigation doesn’t mean that I’ll take the case. Already you are telling me that your brother was mixed up in something sinister enough that you wouldn’t tell the police even after he was dead. This tells me that your case may be too dangerous for me to stick my neck out for. Unless you can give me some more details into what I’ll be getting into here, I won’t be able to help you.

Barbara: (pause)… Alright. Homer, my brother, was a drug addict. When he had died he had gotten pretty involved in the scene. I’m not sure exactly what happened to him, but I know he had started doing a new drug that had recently came into Boston about a month or two ago. He called me a couple weeks before he was killed while he was high on it. He was rambling about.. how it was some new thing.. he didn’t give me a name for what the drug actually was. He just kept saying how he felt like his brain or soul or something like that had been opened up. Later a street walker node found him dead in its brothel. His heart had been cut out.

Otto: Cut out?

Barbara: Yes. The police said it appeared to have been done with something other than a conventional knife, but they have never been able to find the actual weapon.

Otto: It sounds like this was some kind of a revenge killing. Perhaps a drug deal went bad and someone wanted to send a message.

Barbara: My thoughts as well.

Otto: Who would they have wanted to send a message to though?

Barbara: I don’t know.

Otto: Are you sure it wasn’t you? Were you involved with the drugs at all?

Barbara: No never.

Otto: Anyone else he may have known then?

Barbara: Homer and I were not particularly close. I don’t know who his associates may have been.

Otto: Ok. So why can’t you tell the police he was a drug addict?

Barbara: Homer was an engineering professor at BIT, and as part of his employment he was given a generous life insurance policy. As Homer was not married, did not have a wife or child, and the fact that our parents are dead, I am the recipient of the insurance money. However, there is a clause within the insurance policy that if it is discovered that he was on illegal drugs, the policy would be canceled. If I were to tell the police they would by law have to report it to the insurance company and I would be out a lot of money.

Otto: But surely the police would have been able to figure out he was a drug addict when they performed an autopsy.

Barbara: That’s the thing though. They found nothing. No traces of any drugs what so ever. Whatever this new drug is it was able to get past their tests.

Otto: Ok… then Ms. Diya the cost is 500 a day plus expenses. If you can afford that I will take your case.

Barbara: I can afford it.

Otto: Very well. Then, I have a few more questions about your brother. Do you know how long he had been a drug addict for?

Barbara: Well he had always experimented, but it hadn’t gotten bad until about 2 years ago.

Otto: Drug of choice?

Barbara: Well, before the new drug came along he was pretty much always on Molenda X.

Otto: Any known dealers?

Barbara: Not that I know of. We didn’t talk much after he told me he was on Molenda X.

Otto: Speaking of that, how was your relationship with your brother the few months prior to his death?

Barbara: More or less non-existent. Except for the occasional hallucinogenic fueled phone call we almost never spoke.

Otto: It seems strange he would be able to hide his habit from his colleagues and students at his job.

Barbara: I agree. Again, I’m not sure how he did it. We never spoke.

Otto: So I suppose that means you don’t know who his colleagues were then.

Barbara: I’m sorry I don’t. I do know he worked in the robotics department though.

Otto: (pause) Ms. Diya, I have to say it seems a bit bizarre to me that you seem some what cold about the murder and maiming of your brother.

Barbara: What do you want me to say Mr. Vainikainen? I didn’t agree with his lifestyle and tried to distance myself from him as much as I could.

Otto: Then why go through all the trouble of trying to find his killer if you didn’t even like him? And why would he put you on his insurance policy?

Barbara: For the insurance policy, as I had stated before he had no next of kin or wife. I was the next closest person. Also, despite my disagreements with Homer, he still thought fondly of me. He would call me a couple times a month just to talk. As for finding his killer. Well… he’s family.

Otto: But if finding his killer would put the money you are receiving at risk… it just doesn’t seem worth it to me. Even if he was family, it doesn’t sound like you were particular sisterly to him.

Barbara: Again, I’m not sure what to say. It’s easy to ignore and hate your own brother when he’s alive. I’ve found it’s much more difficult when he’s dead… I suppose I need the closer.

Otto: Fair enough. I’m not a psychiatrist, I won’t press you on this anymore. I just want you to think about why you would actually want this investigated.

Barbara: Understood.

Otto: Ok… What about the brothel?

Barbara: Yes… He was found in the one on Washington street. I believe the node that found him was #8. The police interviewed it after the body was found.

Otto: And the police. What have they been able to find so far?

Barbara: Not much. As I said they never found the weapon. The Nodes at the brothel weren’t able to recall him ever entering the building either. Of course there were no security cameras in the brothel, so we weren’t able to get any information from that either.

Otto: Ok. Well that’s a start. Is there a place I can reach you when I find anything more out.

Barbara: Yes. Here is my number and I also work as a librarian at the public library. If you ask for me at the front desk they can lead you in the right direction. I’m writing down my card number too so you can just bill me right to there.

Otto: Very well.

Barbara: Thank you Mr. Vainikainen.

(The sound of Barbara getting up and walking out of Otto’s room, then out of the whole office is heard. After a moment you hear Otto get up from his chair and walk out to Patricia.)

Otto: Get all that?

Patricia: Yep, got it all recorded.

Otto: What do you think?

Patricia: Hmmm. I think the phrase would be ‘a little too convenient.’

Otto: Yeah, I know. It’s hard to tell if she’s hiding whatever she’s hiding out of trying to protect her brother or because of something else.

Patricia: I’m surprised you took the case.

Otto: Well… if the police have already been investigating for 6 months, they probably have the majority of the pieces of the puzzle. Which means we just have to get them and then all I’ll have to do is put it together correctly. On top of that if there was anything TOO sinister going on they would have found out by now. I’m hoping this one will be a quickie.

Patricia: (sarcastically) Yeah. I’m sure that’s exactly how it will work out.

Otto: (sighs) alright, you’re hitting up the police station. I sort of almost burned a bridge with Bates last week so I need to let things cool down over there before I show my face again. (Patricia give an unsurprised ‘mmm’) I need any and all information they have. Tests, autopsy results, testimonials, everything. I’m heading to the brothel on Washington street. If she’s telling the truth, I have a feeling that the police were asking their questions to the nodes in the wrong way. There’s no way something like this could have gotten past a group of street walkers in their own house. I’m going to bring the poly-recorder with me too.

Patricia: Ah man, why don’t I ever get to interrogate the robo-whores?

Otto: Oh the things you kids are into these days. Alright, let’s go.

(the sound of Otto and Patricia leaving the office and closing the door behind them).


(Scene: At the police station.)

(The sound of Patricia walking into the station and walking up to the front desk. Vicki Jones is at the desk.)

Vicki: What do you want?

Patricia: Why Victor, why would you assume that I want anything?

Vicki: Hmm, let me think. Probably because… you’re here. What do you want Patricia?

Patricia: Why can’t a lonely girl in this big city just stop by to say hi to her one and only friend in the entire world?

Vicki: Here’s some advice. Stop wearing black leather and take out some of the metal hanging off your face. Then you won’t be so lonely. You’ll never marry a nice Doctor if all the boys think you’re into the weird stuff.

Patricia: Oh, you know you’re the only man for me Vicki.

Vicki: .… you know Bates has it out for Otto’s balls right?

Patricia: Psh, what do I care? I quit that place 3 months ago.

Vicki: (sarcastically) Oh, well in that case why don’t you just come back and hang with me in the evidence room.

Patricia: You know, you need to watch that attitude? How are you ever going to marry a super model if you’re always so bitter towards woman.

Vicki: Mmm hmm. Like I said. What do you want?

Patricia: … I need some information on the Homer Diya murder case.

Vicki: Like I said, the boys are going to think you’re into the weird stuff.

Patricia: Come on Vicki. This is serious. I’m a friend of his sister Barbara. She’s really torn up about the whole thing, and last I heard you guys haven’t been able to find jack as far as a killer or murder weapon go.

Vicki: Oh, you’re her friend right?

Patricia: Yes, we went to college together.

Vicki: And this has nothing to do with Vainikainen?

Patricia: No!

Vicki: Then what’s Barbara’s middle name?

Patricia: (clears throat) … Mindy.

Vicki: Psh.

Patricia: Oh come one, how many of your friends middle names do you know? That’s not ever a fair question!

Vicki: Ok, what college did she go to?

Patricia: … La Sorbenne?

Vicki: I’m not helping you Patricia.

Patricia: (exasperated) Gah…Fine. Fine, you win. Alright.

Vicki: (joking) Yessss. I won.

Patricia: Shut up… Alright, well I still need your help.

Vicki: Mmm

Patricia: I was in here a couple weeks ago to see Bates and I accidentally forgot my jacket. I left it in the storage closet by the cooler.

Vicki: Oh. You left it in the storage closet.

Patricia: Yes.

Vicki: That storage closet over there. The large dark storage closet.

Patricia: Yes.

Vicki: The kind of storage closet someone could store a guy whose been knocked out for an extended amount of time.

Patricia: God damn it Vicki. If I knocked you out what would I do then? There is still a full staff on duty here. Are you going to help me or not?

Vicki: … Alright. Follow me. (the sound of Vicki and Patricia walking over to the closet, opening the door, and walking in and the door closing behind them). Ok. Here we are. Now what? Are you going to hit me over the head with a brick or put a rag with chloroform over my mouth? (the sound of Patricia unzipping something, then grabbing Vicki and kissing him for an extended amount of time). …wait!

Patricia: What?

Vicki: Is this about me or is it about the murder case?

Patricia: What murder case? (the sound of them continuing to kiss. Sound fades out)

(Scene: Otto at the brothel).

(fade in sound of the street. The sound of Otto opening car door and closing it. sound of Otto walking up to the brothel. Door opens and closes. Sound of Otto walking into the Brothel and up to the desk).

Otto: Hello

Node 1: (robotic and monotone) Greetings past, present or future lover. Please present state issued pictorial identification card with birth date present for age, criminal record verification and billing information.

Otto: Ok (sound of him opening up wallet and holding up ID).

Node 1: (beeps and scans) Greetings Olavi Vainikainen, your bank account has now been debited. I am Deirdre and I am here to service your every pleasure. How may I help you? (talking fast and in a different voice) State law requires that I inform you at this time that that the node you are currently speaking to name is not Deirdre and is in fact not human, but a pleasure node designated as Node 1 by the management of Pleasure Street Walkers Brothel of Washington Street. If you the user chooses to or not to partake in a legal action or lawsuit against Pleasure Street Walkers Brothel of Washington Street or Node 1, at no point will the management of Pleasure Street Walkers Brothel of Washington Street, Node 1 nor the Massachusetts court of law accept ‘Deirdre’ as the name of Node 1. At this time we would also like to encourage you to not take legal action against Pleasure Street Walkers Brothel of Washington Street or Node 1, also not known as Deirdre.

Otto: Right (sound of him putting card back in his wallet). Uh. So hi Deirdre. I’m looking for a special lady for the night. I heard from a friend that, er, Node 8 was a good time.

Node 1: Yes Olavi, Node 8, also not know as Beatrice, is known for her good time inducing qualities. I will arrange for a meeting with you two now. Please note that the concept of a “Good Time” is abstract and unknown to pleasure nodes who, despite their acting abilities, are actually emotionless and have little to no interest in you as a person. The management of Pleasure Street Walkers Brothel of Washington Street would like to recommend at this time that you explore your own personal concept of happiness, possibly under the supervision of a psychiatrist or industrial strength social worker. We promise not to charge you extra for this.

Otto: Um… thanks.

Node 1: Thank you for your patience Olavi. Please proceed down the hallway to room 28, where a pleasure node named Beatrice will not be waiting for you. Please note that by ‘patience’ we mean ‘endurance’ and by ‘waiting’ we mean ‘cessation of abeyance’

Otto: …Ok. (the sound of Otto walking down the hallway. As he passes other rooms you can hear the sounds of people having sex with robots. They are making monotone robotic sex noises. Sound of Otto opening the door to room 28, entering and closing behind him). Hello. You must… not be Beatrice.

Node 8: Correct. I am here to act out your every fantasy. Please state fantasy in clear English towards my microphone input unit. If multiple fantasies are to be carried out, please list them in numbered order by priority.

Otto: Oh baby. Well. Let me tell you. My number one fantasy is to talk to a pleasure node about police murder investigations.

Node 8: (sound of beeps for a moment) This is an acceptable fantasy of which I have experience in. (sound of beeps) you may now begin fantasy. I will alert you when you have reached 65% completion of your hour.

Otto: Great. Well, it would really turn me on if we could talk about the murder of Homer Diya, as I know his body was found here.

Node 8: Yes, that happened. It was really hot.

Otto: Oh I bet. Tell me, what happened.

Node 8: He was found dead. It was hot.

Otto: With his heart cut out right?

Node 8: Oh yeah baby. It was totally not in his body.

Otto: Were you the one who found him.

Node 8: Yes.

Otto: Did you see him at all prior to him being killed? Like walking around the brothel?

Node 8: Please note that this question is not part of the previously stated fantasy. We are now speaking about Homer Diya being alive rather than him being murdered.

Otto: Oh. That’s a fantasy of mine too. Um.. fantasy number 2.

Node 8: (beeps) No, baby I did not see him before hand. I just found him dead. Then the police came and I told them that I had found him dead.

Otto: Hey not Beatrice.

Node 8: Yes.

Otto: I have another fantasy. And this one is so hot to me I’m putting it as fantasy number 1. (Node 8 beeps). My greatest fantasy is to talk to a pleasure node about a murder after she’s used the pleasure slave directive to override the subterfuge code that causes her to falsify her testimony.

Node 8: (beeps a bunch) Done.

Otto: Nice.

Node 8: This is hot.

Otto: Yeah it is. Now, tell me. Did you see Homer Diya alive in the brothel before he was murdered.

Node 8: That information has been deleted from my memory.

Otto: (shocked) What?… Who deleted it?

Node 8: That information has been deleted.

Otto: …Did you certify the deletion?

Node 8: That information has been deleted. (Otto lets out a long breath) This is hot.

Otto: …Ok. Um. Hey, I have another fantasy I would like to act out.

Node 8: Affirmative.

Otto: Fantasy number 3. I would really love to be able to sit in the room where Homer Diya’s body was found while you stay in the room here alone for the remainder of the session.

Node 8: That is hot. Please proceed to room 35 and I will sit here being totally hot.

Otto: …Right. (the sound of Otto walking to the door, opening it and closing. Walks down the hallway while robotic sex noises are happening. Stops at Room 35. Opens the door, walks in, closes door behind him.) …And here we are…


(Scene: Storage closet at the police station.)

Patricia: (takes a drag off of a cigarette) You really are an ass Vicki.

Vicki: Hey, you’re not allowed to smoke on police premises you know.

Patricia: Do you always have to talk about work right after sex? (Vicki grunts disapprovingly). …Oh hey, look at the time. It’s just after 11pm which means..

Vicki: ..Which means no one is going to be guarding the evidence and records rooms for another hour. On top of that the cleaning crew is gone and only the midnight police staff is on duty. The midnight police staff who also conveniently only work in the east wing of the building, as opposed to the west wing which is where the evidence and records room is and where we also conveniently are in.

Patricia: (sarcastically) Gasp! Do you think we should alert Sherriff Bates about this egregious hole in his precincts security that’s been going on for the last 2 and ½ weeks?

Vicki: Hey, the security cameras are still working. Including the one that probably caught us going into this room.

Patricia: Oh, you mean the left center one? Because I think that one may be having a glitch for the next, uhhh, 90 minutes where it’s showing a rerun of yesterdays recording.

Vicki: Geeeeez… You still have the other cameras to get past though, including the evidence room.

Patricia: That’s true. And that’s where you’re going to help me.

Vicki: Ha! I don’t think so.

Patricia: Oh I do think so. Or I’m going to show Bates this video tape I just recorded of you having sex with Otto Vainikainen’s assistant while you were supposed to be watching the lobby desk (sound of an electronic device being pulled out and whirring).

Vicki: Damnit… Are you really trying to help out?

Patricia: Yes. Barbara Diya hired Otto to find the killer. That’s all.

Vicki: But why? We’re working on it. Besides, from what I’ve heard the case is dry. Almost no helpful evidence.

Patricia: She gave Otto information she couldn’t give you guys..

Vicki: Huh?

Patricia: It’s nothing… apocalyptic. It would just get her in a bunch of crap if she opened up about it to the state.

Vicki: (sighs) alright.

Patricia: Great! (sound of her getting up and opening the door).

Vicki: Hang on! Don’t you want to put on any clothes?

Patricia: Oh come on! What’s the fun in sneaking around if you aren’t adding on as many layers of danger as you can.

Vicki: God. Well at least put your coat on over you.

Patricia: Fine. (sound of Patricia putting on the coat, and Vicki putting his clothes back on quickly).

Vicki: Alright, let’s go. (sound of them walking quietly). Shhhhh!

Patricia: (whispering) Ok.

Vicki: (sound of more quiet walking) (whispering) Ok. Here’s the computer. (sound of futuristic typing) I unlocked it. Do your thing.

Patricia: (whispering) One sec. (sound of typing). There the cameras are down and the evidence and records room is unlocked. I used an anonymous login so they won’t be able to trace it back to you.

Vicki: (whispering) If I was being cocky I would say that you have 5 minutes before someone notices. But realistically, you probably have all night the way those midnight staff jokers actually monitor the screens.

Patricia: (whispering) alright, let’s go. (Sound of quietly walking). Shhh! I hear someone coming! (Patricia and Vicki get quiet. In the distance you hear to people talking as they walk past, then fade away). Ok, clear, let’s go.

Vicki: (whispering) Here we are, Evidence and Records room. You better get some good information for all the trouble you’re putting me through. (sound of the door opening, them walking in and then the door closing behind them).

Patricia: (Whispering) Stay here and watch the door. I’m going to look around.

Vicki: (whispering) Ok

Patricia: (Sound of her walking and then opening a filing cabinet). (Whispering) Let’s see (sound of her flipping through files). Here we are, Homer Diya. (sound of her pulling files out of cabinet, opening it, and flipping through the pages). Oh! Pictures. Yes, he certainly did have his heart cut out didn’t he?

Vicki: (whispering) Yep

Patricia: (whispering) Let’s see. Hmm. Not much in the records. Professor of Engineering in the robotics department of BIT, we already knew that. The statement of the Street Walker Node that found him. Quote “I found him dead. It was hot.” … Nice. Blood results were clean, just some small traces of caffeine. Hmm. I don’t know, there’s not much here. Maybe Otto can get more out of this. Where’s the holo-copy machine?

Vicki: (whispering) over there. Be quick!

Patricia: (whispering) I’m going , I’m going! (sound of her walking over to the copy machine and starting to scan pages). Hmmm. Wait a minute look at this picture.

Vicki: (whispering) What? (sound of him walking over to Patricia)

Patricia: (whispering) Well, it looks like there’s something inside the empty chest cavity. Right there. It looks like a little light bulb and wires or something sticking out the left side of his inner rib cage? It’s hard to see.

Vicki: (whispering) Huh. Yeah. I see that. I don’t know.

Patricia: (whispering) The autopsy report says there was nothing of interest found though.

Vicki: (whispering) Maybe they missed it?

Patricia: (whispering) If I can see it, even faintly, in this picture I can’t imagine that the person doing the autopsy would have missed as they were digging around with their hands. Who did the autopsy?

Vicki: (whispering) I don’t know

Patricia: (flipping through the documents) (whispering) That’s so weird. It doesn’t have records of the person who did the autopsy. Just their report. The report is written by hand too. Do you recognize this hand writing by any chance?

Vicki: (whispering) Why would you ever think I would be able to answer that question.

Patricia: (whispering) Alright ass. I’m finished up here. I’m bringing these copies to Otto.

Vicki: (whispering) Ok, just hurry up.

Patricia: (whispering) Ok. (sound of her walking back to the filling cabinet and flipping through the pages of her copies). Hey… It says here there was some physical evidence they found in his pocket. Um. A small box. Marked as #IW784. Is it here?

Vicki: (whispering) Check the shelf.

Patricia: (walking over to the evidence shelf) Uhhhh. Here it is. Huh. It’s small and sliver. It has like a latch and a little button on it for opening the top. It looks like one of the things some people keep, like, nail clippers and tweezers in… when I press down the button the top doesn’t open though. Hmmm (flipping through papers) it says here they tried to get it open but were never able to. No distinguishing features of interest on it either. I wonder… (Sound of her fiddling with the box. Suddenly you hear something slide and beeps). Ah! There we go.

Vicki: (Whispering) What did you do?

Patricia: (Whispering) The reason they weren’t able to open it, or pry it open, is because it’s been sealed with an electro-cyber-seal.

Vicki: (whispering) A what in the what?

Patricia: (whispering) an electro-cyber-seal. It’s a newish type of lock made by the Cyberverse company. Basically it lets you add electronic password protected heavy locks to the physical items. The only way to undo the lock is by activating the system and then by entering the password. The trick though, is that they hide the activation mechanism. I put these locks on some of my jewelry boxes, so I know what to feel for.

Vicki: (whispering) but now you have to type in the password

Patricia: (whispering) yeah… That’s the hard part. The password is only four characters long, so it shouldn’t be too hard to crack. Here, I have my wireless password cracker in my jacket pocket. (sound of Patricia taking device out of pocket. It opens and whirs)

Vicki: (whispering) does that thing actually work?

Patricia: (whispering) Yeah. Well. I mean pretty much. The more characters it has to come up with the longer it takes and for passwords over 10 characters it’s pretty inaccurate. (Sound of device beeping). Ok, it has the password. Now to enter it in. (sound of beeps). There we go. And there, it’s open (sound of the case opening).

Vicki: (whispering) Hmmm. What is that?

Patricia: (whispering) I don’t know. There’s like. A small green pebble glowing in there.

Vicki: Wait… That’s not…


Vicki: Oh my god! It’s a hyper-neuro bomb!

Patricia: Ah!

Vicki: Come on we have to get out of the building!

Patricia: Go run and warn the others in the building! Here take the copies and get them to Otto (sound of her giving him the papers). I’m going to try to get the hyper-neuro pebble out!

Vicki: No! Let the damn box blow up! Come on!

Patricia: Go! (sound of Patricia running out of the room)

Vicki: (going off in the distance as the sound of Patricia panting and running in the foreground can be heard) God damnit! GET OUT! EVERYONE GET OUT OF THE BUILDING! BOMB! BOMB!

Patricia: (while running and huffing) Oh god! Oh god!


Patricia: (still running) Oh no, no. Bomb squad, have to get to the bomb squad room. (more running). Here! (sound of her opening the door). Tools, have to find the tools (sound of her opening and desk and scrounging through the drawers).


Patricia: Aaaah! (faster scrambling) Here! (Sound of her taking a tool. It unlatches. Sound of her picking around in the box with the tool for a moment). Almost…. Almost have it.

LOUD ROBOTIC VOICE: STATUS IMMINENT (beeping gets very loud and very fast).

Patricia: Aaaaaah (Faster picking) Got it! (sound of Patricia running and huffing while out of breath out of the room and down the hallway trying to get out of the building before the bomb explodes. The sound of the beeping trails off in the distance as she runs away from it) Oh god, oh god! (Sound of her running fades away).

(Scene: Otto in room 35 at the brothel).

Otto: (sound of him taking out a tape recorder and pressing the button). This is Otto Vainikainen. It is January 23rd 2430 at around 11:15pm-ish, and I am currently in the room that Homer Diya’s body was found. It is room 35 at the Pleasure Street Walkers Brothel of Washington St. Let’s see what we can find here (sound of Otto walking around). Well, the room has clearly been cleaned up since the body was found. Not surprising seeing as how it was six months ago when the body was found. (more walking around). Hmmm, it’s hard to say where to begin really.

Looking at the bed (sound of sheets ruffling) there doesn’t appear to be anything suspicious, neither on the bed or under the sheets. (sound of picking up the mattress). Nothing in between the mattress. (stretching) Uhhh, nothing of real concern underneath the bed. I’m moving over the chair by the window. (walking) nothing there really. Just a chair. (stretching) nothing under the chair either….

However, now that I’m down here I do see that there is an air vent behind one of the legs of the chair. That’s always my favorite hiding spot for contraband. Let’s see here (sound of Otto moving the chair out of the way and bending down). Hmm. Well, it’s screwed shut. Luckily I have my handy screwdriver on me. (sound of him taking the screw driver out of his pocket and trying to unscrew the air vent). Hmm. It’s screwed in pretty tightly. Probably means there’s nothing back here then as the person who committed the murder probably wouldn’t have time to do such a thorough job of screwing the vent back in. But, just to be sure, I’ll activate the electric power function on my screwdriver and get this open (sound of him unscrewing the vent and then taking it apart).

There we go… Ah… we have something here. Hmmm (sound of him reaching down and picking something up). It looks like… a burnt up battery. Hmmm. The battery to a laser saw perhaps? A laser saw that would have had its battery burn out while cutting through the hard bone of someone’s chest? And of course when the battery burnt out it would have gotten very hot and started smoking, meaning that the killer couldn’t have just walked out the front door without someone noticing the smoking laser saw in his pocket. So he… or maybe she even… would have to stash the smoking battery in the air duct, as the suction would pull the smoke out of the building and then spread it out thus making it almost unnoticeable. Hmmm.

My question then is, the killer would have wanted to get out of the room quickly. It seems strange that he would have taken such care, given the amount of time he had to do it, to seal the vent so tightly… That being stated I suppose he could have brought an electric screwdriver like I have. But the fact that the killer was using a laser saw that wasn’t strong enough to not burn out when cutting through the victim shows a lack of foresight and planning you think someone would need in order to think to bring an electric screwdriver in case you needed it to unscrew a vent to hide something. Hmm… Well I think I’m done here. I’m going to think about this. I’m taking the battery with me (sound of him putting it in his pocket). Otto out. (sound of Otto turning off the tape recorder). Now, how to occupy that node for another 25 minutes.

(A loud explosion is heard in the distance). What the hell was that? (sound of Otto running over the window and opening it). Explosion. There’s smoke. Where is that? I hope that’s not where I think it is. (Sound of Otto walking to the door. Opening and walking out in the hallway. He walks down the hallway, robot sex noises in the background. He walks up to the front desk). Excuse me…

Node 1: Hello Olavi Vainikainen, is not Beatrice to your satisfaction.

Otto: Yeah, hey there was just a big explosion and it looks like it’s coming from further downtown. Can you turn the news on the TV?

Node 1: Of course Olavi. (sound of TV turning on).

Reporter on TV: …with the stock market dipping slightly today given the news of Alex Uthus’s resignation from Tomorrow Tech. … Excuse me ladies and gentleman. I have just been handed an urgent report. There appears to be a significant explosion that has just occurred in downtown Boston. It is unknown how many people are injured but it seems to have come from the area near the main Boston Police Department. We will continue to monitor the story…

Otto: No! (Sound of Otto running out of the brothel and getting into his car. He is breathing heavily.) God damn it, god damn it (sounds of him pulling out a phone and dialing a number.) Come on, come on (voicemail immediately picks up)

Patricia’s Voicemail: Hello, you reached Patricia Lacroix at…

Otto: Oh man (Sound of him hanging up phone. He Starts the cars and screeches into traffic) God damnit, God damnit. Don’t be there. (Sound of traffic swerving by and the engine running. Otto is breathing heavy). Patricia, come on. (dialing her number again. The voicemail picks up again) Damn! (more driving noises. Sound of sirens as well. Sound of Otto suddenly breaking). Oh no. (Sound of Otto getting out of the car. The sound of a fire blazing and sirens. People are yelling in the distance. You hear Otto walking and breathing heavily. The sound of the fire gets closer). PATRICIA!? PATRICIAAAA?!! (more walking and breathing) GOD DAMN IT NO! PATRICIA!!!?? PATRICIAAAAAA!!!??

Patricia: (In the distance) OTTO!!

Otto: Patricia! (sound of him running over to her)

Patricia: Otto! Otto! (sound of them hugging.) (her voice is shaken and tearful) Oh god Otto.

Otto: (after a moment of them breathing heavily and hugging). (While panting) Are you ok?

Patricia: Yeah. I’m fine. My ears just hurt a lot. But I’ll be ok. I plugged them after I was clear of the building like you taught me too.

Otto: (after another moment, the sound of them letting go of each other and stepping back). …Hello Vicki. I’m glad you made it out too.

Vicki: I’m glad too. It looks like I was able to get most of the midnight staff out as well. I’m not sure if it was all yet, but I think I got everyone.

Otto: Ok…

Patricia: … Here. (sound of handing him papers) I got the copies of the evidence.

Otto: (after a second, and clearing his through). Patricia I don’t know what you’re talking about.

Vicki: its ok, I helped her.

Otto: …I won’t tell anyone.

Vicki: Thanks.

Patricia: We also found this box. It was in the pocket of Homer Diya when they found his body. It had a hyper-neuro pebble bomb in it when we opened it. I managed to get it out.

Otto: Ok…Hey… are you?… Under the jacket?… Why are you naked?

Patricia: Oh… Ummm… Would you believe that all of my clothes disintegrated in the explosion?

Otto: (pause) … Jesus Christ Vicki, you’re screwing my assistant!?

Vicki: Uhhhh

Patricia: Hey!… Don’t talk him like that… He’s my boyfriend…

Otto: (groan)

Vicki: (clears throat) …Um… Maybe we should see what’s in the box?

Otto: (sighs) alright… But me and you are going to talk later. (sound of box opening up). Alright it’s open…Ummm. I don’t know. It just looks like. Pebbles. Or small marbles. Multi-colored I think. It’s hard to see in this light. (sound of sirens coming from the distance).

Vicki: I’m assuming that Sherriff Bates is in one of those cars.

Otto: We have to get out of here. He’s not going to be happy with us when he finds out that the station blew up due to us snooping around in the evidence locker.

Patricia: Wait. Vicki, what are you going to tell him.

Vicki: Uhh. Well. The truth.

Patricia: But…

Vicki: Look, can you come up with an excuse elaborate enough to explain how I found a hyper-neuro bomb just laying around the station at a time I should have been off duty?

Otto: Alright, Patricia, we’ll deal with Bates later. Right now we need to get this evidence secure before Bates takes it back. … Vicki, it’s been interesting as always.

Vicki: I’ll say.

(sound of Patricia and Otto running back to the car and getting in. Starting up the car and then driving off).

Otto: Now, where are we going to hide this until we appease the good Sherriff?

Patricia: Here, I’m putting an address into your GPS (sound of her using the GPS). I have a friend who can help. Stop by my apartment too, I need to get some clothes.

Otto: Ok.

Patricia: …So after all this are we really keeping this case? Are we dropping?

Otto: I don’t know. I don’t know. I need to think. Gah… just because some murdering drug dealer was able to get his hands on a hyper-neuro bomb doesn’t mean this is too big for us. If you’re some what smart you can pay for those on the black market. The murderer was probably just trying to send another message. You know how I am with this stuff. I don’t like the idea of creeps bringing neuro-bombs into my city. …It’s going to take more than one explosion to get me to quit.

Patricia: …I’m ok quitting after one…

Otto: Ha…

Patricia: (after a moment) …So how was the brothel?

Otto: Umm… technical… and legal. Very legal. I found out some things of interest though. We can swap what we found out when we get to… whoever your friend is… who I’m assuming we can trust by the way.

Patricia: Yep, we can… By the way, this case being a quickie… told you so.

Otto: Thanks.

Patricia: You’re welcome.

(sound of the car driving fades away).


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